(no subject)

[deshabille_maladicta]

This was the worst feeling in the world. Maladicta had suffered going Cold Bat, twice, had seen one extremely unpleasant and one viciously frightening war (simultaneously) and, since her arrival on the island, come up against a myriad of generally uncomfortable and sometimes frightening experiences, mostly different versions of being sick or wounded that had never been a possibility before. This was the worst feeling so far.

She had her pack over her shoulder and her gaze on the ground, though she wasn't especially seeing it. She was wound up, too many thoughts going around her head for her to be much of anything but distracted, and anyway her vision was blurry. She couldn't hold on to any one thought long enough to look at it or grapple with it. They all just crammed together and shifted around.

The compound was her destination, and if she hadn't decided that before taking off to stride brusquely into the night she couldn't fathom where she'd have ended up. The night didn't used to be a problem for her. On the contrary, it had always been a boon, a relief, especially after wearing the Ribbon. Now she was almost as blind in it as anyone though, again, the tears didn't help.

She just needed someplace to curl up, and she could deal with it all in the morning. She was sure. She had to be, or else everything would simply fall apart, even more than it already had.

Comments

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

She gave her a hard look at that, but it softened at once and she didn't have it in her heart to scold this time. "You're not a nuisance," she said gently. "You never are. I don't want to see you have to sleep somewhere uncomfortable and public, particularly not when you're upset like this. Honestly, I'd worry."

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

"...All right," Maladicta says softly, because she doesn't have it in her to fight. And selfishly- and she knows it's selfish- she wants to be around Sacharissa. She's the closest friend she has.

She needs someone to feel safe around.

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

Sacharissa's expression shifted, softened, a slow smile forming, and she adjusted the strap on her shoulder. Once it was hanging more comfortably, she held out a hand to Maladicta - then slid her arm through hers instead, linking them the way she would walk with Jane. She needed a barrier like that, needed to think of it that way: This I would do with Jane and this, but never that. Safety of a different kind.

"Good," she said quietly, leading the way back toward Green Arrow Estates. "You can stay as long as you need, but you mustn't ever think you're being a burden. I don't know why everyone's so certain they are. It's what friends are meant to do."

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

Maladicta leaned slightly into the comfort of the gesture.

"Thank you. I... hopefully it won't be long. I mean it can't be..." She sounded unsure and doubtful and, under that, faintly scared.

"More than a few days, I'm sure."

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

"Not even that," Sacharissa said soothingly. She'd seen William fight a hundred battles, half of them against her. He was stubborn as the day was long and prouder even than that, but she couldn't imagine he would risk his relationship with Maladicta.

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

Maladicta nodded a little, fingers absently curling and uncurling against Sacharissa's sleeve, a nervous gesture, the only place it physically showed.

"Right," she said softly, and then, after a moment of being very quiet, "I'm so furious with him."

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

"With every right." Sacharissa's own fingers curled, muscles tensing in her free arm, as if she wished he were there right then so she could crack him a good one. He'd deserve it. "The way he behaved was completely uncalled for." Slanting through the trees, the moonlight dappled Maladicta when Sacharissa looked over at her, patches of blue illuminating the perfect line of her face.

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

She she shook her head a little, eyes flashing, catching the moonlight reflected off the pale of her skin- she was just so bloody angry- but the hurt made her tired and her head was fuzzy from crying, so she closed her eyes for a moment until it passed. Then she narrowed them at Sacharissa.

"What the hell were you doing walking around alone in the dark?"

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

"I was walking," Sacharissa said dryly. "Sometimes I go for a walk. It's nice out here alone at night." They weren't far from the hut now. Sacharissa couldn't help walking with her head half-turned at all times, a gentle ache tugging at the side of her neck to remind her that this wasn't the most comfortable of positions.

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

"Don't be clever at me," Maladicta said dryly, arching an eyebrow and glancing over at Sacharissa. "If my head weren't an absolute mess I'd be giving you a very disapproving look, you know."

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

In a way, that made Maladicta's being upset all the more unfortunate. Sacharissa wouldn't have admitted it aloud, but she sort of liked the disapproving look. "I'm a grown woman, Maladicta, nearly 23," she said with a soft laugh. "I'm capable of walking on my own, I really am."

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

Maladicta pulled a face at that, very lightly clicking her tongue against the back of her teeth.

"Oh, you're older than me," she murmured, "That's ridiculous."

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

"Ha!" Sacharissa said, triumph encapsulated in a single syllable. "You see? And you walk around at night by yourself. There's nothing the least bit wrong with it." As they came closer to the hut, she sped her steps, again adjusting the strap of Maladicta's bag on her shoulder.

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

"To be fair, I'm armed and actually know how to use it now," Maladicta pointed out, keeping pace easily with Sacharissa. "And I don't walk alone at night often." Usually because she would wait for William so that he wouldn't walk alone at night, to be fair.

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

"I have my spring-gonne," Sacharissa responded easily, "though it's not on me at the moment." She pushed open the door of the little hut, ushering Sacharissa in ahead of her. "It's small, but it's home, I suppose."

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

"It's lovely," Maladicta said, smiling a little, which wasn't easy, but at least was easier with Sacharissa in close proximity.

"And impressive because you did it yourself."

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

"Well, it stands up at least," Sacharissa sighed. Stepping inside, she walked over to her bed. She shrugged off the bag, letting it slide onto the sheet. "I don't spend much time in it, really, so it serves its purpose."

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

"It has a comforting feel to it," she said, because it's cozy wasn't quite right. But it wasn't hers, and she was feeling that acutely, suddenly, like a sting in her breast, but she tried not to let on.

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

Sacharissa didn't quite agree, but she didn't want to say so - to point out that, alone at night, there was no comfort in the small hut. Having Maladicta there made it seem a little more like a home. "Please," she said, "make yourself comfortable. Have a seat."

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

"Thank you." Maladicta nodded a little and sat, dropping with near alarming speed but more than enough grace to an easy crouch, then lowered herself so she sat on the floor, knees half drawn up.

"I am utterly exhausted," she sighed, sounding mostly annoyed by it.

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

And still Sacharissa was on her feet, rocking from foot to foot before she made herself stop. There was a moment's stillness, and then she was leaning over to remove her boots. "You should sleep," she said. "Get some rest. It'll all clear up come morning. Maybe he'll wake up and realize he's being a moron." There was a first time for everything, after all.

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

Maladicta laughed once, a short sound that would have been sharp under normal circumstances. As it was, it seemed to lack some humor.

"Maybe," she said softly, not skeptically but clearly not with any faith. Barely any hope, even. She reached down, pulling her boots off, a little absently.

"Sacharissa," she said, after a moment, looking up. "Thank you again."

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

"You're welcome," Sacharissa murmured, a reflex more than anything else - the proper thing to say at the proper time. "Now stop thanking me. I'd do more if there was anything I could do." Although she had a good mind to do more come the morning, just as soon as she could find William.

[dishabille-mal.livejournal.com]

"I'm only stopping because you told me to and you're a gracious hostess," Maladicta said, before pulling off the white shirt she usually went around in, leaving her in the tanktop beneath and her uniform trousers. She folded the shirt and put it in her bag, frowning briefly at the still missing, long-gone clasp.

[headline-maker.livejournal.com]

She was starting to see the flaw in this plan.

"Well, while you're doing as I say, I hope you know you're taking the bed," Sacharissa said, eyes still turned delicately away. She smoothed her palms flat against her skirt, weighing whether or not it was really necessary for her to strip down to her shift tonight.